While I at first hoped to get the first four chapters of Compline written this long weekend, I'm set to finish only two. I suppose that's better than nothing. The first two chapters -- actually, the first chapter was extremely difficult to write as I didn't have a precise point as to where I can start the book, and it almost felt as if I were working on a picaresque, which isn't the point of the book.
Anyway, I'm halfway through the second chapter and made myself stop and save it. I'll pick it up again tomorrow and finish the rest of it. There are a number of items in my notes for this book that sound fantastic as a story idea, but the actual writing of it -- turning that idea into a logical, cohesive part of the story -- might prove to be more challenging than expected. Maybe because there are a lot of abstractions that require a concrete expression, if you get my drift.
Yesterday I fussed with this site -- not that anything I do will make it less old school-looking because Blogger -- and switched themes for a brief moment. Then discovered a problem with the background that i can't fix and so went back to this theme but with a different background this time. I kind of need a pop of color, anyway, but I'm still trying to find a lighter image that works properly with the nature of this site / blog and especially the books I write.
One other thing I was reminded of is that I don't do well with long breaks. As much as I need to take extra time off from the day job, I can see that I'm perfectly good with three-day weekends at most. I haven't had an all-out vacation in years, truth be told, and with me coming back to full-time work after the lockdowns, I find I'm better taking extra days off throughout the year as opposed to setting aside large chunks of time once or twice a year. I find I'm able to maintain myself much more efficiently that way, and I never reach a point of being bored out of my mind since I'm able to fill each day with not just chores, but more self-directed pampering.
As for my previous whining about my day job and the difficulties I've been having there, I did try to look around and even apply for a few positions, but I know each is a long shot and that I'm not holding on to hope with any of them. That said, I'm also talking myself off the ledge and doing a lot of reflecting, if you will, about my situation, weighing all pros and cons. It doesn't help -- and yet it does, ironically -- that the job I currently have is the only one of its kind around here, and I get all the benefits that come with working full-time.
So I suppose I'm working on being more mature about this and not succumbing to this weird cycle I have toward work (any job I happen to have), when I begin to feel unhappy and dissatisfied on the third year of employment. It's a mental pattern I've observed in myself, and I'm going through it now. But I have to remind myself that this job, especially, is one I'm most qualified for, and I need to put on my big girl panties and soldier on because there's nothing else out there that's anywhere close to this.
On the brighter side, I really am good at what I do (years of experience -- since 1989 if you want to know), and I do have leverage. I just need to know how to use it to my benefit.
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